Why I Was Afraid To Leave My Job (+ Why I Ultimately Chose To)


Change ain’t easy. And a few weeks ago, I made a decision that changed my life.

It’s true. After four years of being a Merchandiser at Perry Ellis, my time at the company has come to an end. This was one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever made in my professional career. For four years, I never doubted my career, never wanted to leave, and really enjoyed the relationships I created. And then things changed, very quickly. I wasn’t actively searching for a job, but an amazing opportunity came my way that I didn’t want to pass up.

I was afraid of change

I’ve been at Perry Ellis for over four years. It was my first job out of college, the only corporate job I’ve ever known. So yeah, naturally, it was so scary to take the next step in my career. When the time came to decide if would stay with Perry Ellis or take a new position, I had to seriously push myself to accept a new challenge. I knew this opportunity would be the only way to push myself out of my comfort zone and help expand my Merchandising skills. Which leads me to my next point…

I was comfortable

I think it’s safe to say that over four years, I learned really valuable Merchandising skills. I got up every day, settled into my desk, surrounded by people that have become friends over the years. I had a routine, I knew everyone, I understood the company culture, and I just felt comfortable in my role.

But that’s where I think it became a red flag in my mind. If I wanted to climb the ladder, and begin actually succeeding, I needed to get the heck out of my comfort zone. Sure, I could have pushed myself more at work, but I think shaking things up and starting somewhere new will force me to challenge myself in my career.

I still enjoyed my job

This was probably the most confusing part for me. I wasn’t unhappy at Perry Ellis by any means. I built an amazing relationship with my boss. She was by far the smartest person I knew, and I learned everything from her. I had hysterical coworkers that made work enjoyable. I felt proud of the product we were putting out there. So why did I want to leave? You know what? I’m not that sure.

But I do know that it was a familiar feeling.

After four years of college, I just felt ready. Ready to come back home to New York City, and begin the journey to establish myself in the fashion industry. And that’s exactly what I did. I even remember talking to this point in my interview with my future bosses. You know what they both told me years later? That was one of the biggest reasons why they hired me over another candidate.

Now, just a little over four years after I began my career, something inside of me was just telling me that I was ready to take the next step.

This is the funny thing about leaving a job: Nothing can prepare you for the moment when you put in your resignation. Since this was my first job, it meant a lot to me. I’m a sentimental person, and I take my relationships super seriously. It’s not an easy thing to tell people you’re really close with that you’re leaving. It truly was really hard for me to tell my boss that I was putting in my two weeks. I cried to her. A lot. I didn’t want her to take things personally. I didn’t want to leave her at all. While I know this is a bit dramatic, because I know that’s just the cycle of corporate environments.

I didn’t know what to do with my blog

Leaving Perry Ellis wasn’t something that was in my mind for a long time. The process happened rather quickly. But once the possibility of me leaving the company became real, I had to stop and think: “Do I want to go full time with The Champagne Edit?” This thought didn’t last long, and I think the answer is obvious: I am not ready to give my my Merchandising career yet. I shouldn’t say “yet”, because I’m not sure I’ll ever be ready. I had to put things into perspective: while I make a decent amount through my blog, it’s not enough to sustain my lifestyle. Sure, my lifestyle could be altered if I truly wanted to pursue blogging as a full time gig, but at this point, it’s a no from me dawg.

All of these fears, questions, and thoughts lead me to believe one thing: If I was questioning my job, then I needed to change it. I looked past the doubts and saw opportunity. I’m not typically a super optimistic person, but I went with my gut on this decision.


photos by allie provost 


do it for the ‘gram

  • You know I’m not the queen of color, but I can’t get enough of this sorbet colored rainbow dress🌈😍 HAPPY FRIDAY MY PEOPLE🙌🏻
.
.
Shop this dress via the @liketoknow.it app!💫 http://liketk.it/2DvaK #liketkit
  • Vacation style made easy thanks to the @anntaylor_nyc Rockefeller Center store👏🏻 I immediately was able to pick out looks from the new collection and was so excited to wear them in Nantucket😍 These linen pants helped me beat the summer heat and still looked put together for a dinner on the water🙌🏻 #partnership #myannstyle #thisisann
  • Two of the most beautiful things in the world: Iced coffee and hydrangeas🤣😉 (But you totally agree, no?)
.
.
Q: WHAT’S YOUR GO TO COFFEE ORDER?! Let me know and I’ll pick one of your next coffee order’s to be on me😉🙌🏻☕️
  • Very into these Nantucket summer nights😍
.
.
My entire look is linked in the @liketoknow.it app💫 My tube top comes in 13846271 colors and it’s .....wait for it.... $8!!!😳😱 http://liketk.it/2DmNN #liketkit #ltkunder50 #ltksalealert
  • Wheels up✈️ So ready for a long weekend in Nantucket🙌🏻 What’s your travel style? Typically I’m into the cozy looks, but since this is such a short flight, I decided to put on real pants🤣😌
.
.
Shop my airport style by using the @liketoknow.it app💫 http://liketk.it/2DgP5 #liketkit #LTKtravel #LTKshoecrush #thechampagnetravels #LTKunder100 #LTKstyletip #nantucket #ACK
  • Flowy skirts paired with casual sweatshirts and sneaks? I’m v into this suddenly😍🙌🏻
.
.
Shop this look using the @liketoknow.it app or by clicking the link in my bio💫 These sneakers are THE most comfortable ones I own because of the squishy insole🙌🏻 http://liketk.it/2DehZ #liketkit #ltkshoecrush
  • Some days I want to be super feminine, and other days I want to be cool AF like @aninebing 🤷🏻‍♀️ but that’s the beauty of fashion, right? You can wear what you want, when you want, and how you want👏🏻🙌🏻 // 📸 by @laurelcreative
  • #SWEEPSTAKES ALERT #ad I'm happy to be partnering with @degree for their #MadeToMove campaign to help inspire YOU to get out and move - whether it's a class, a walk outside, or running after your kids🤸🏻‍♀️🧘🏻‍♀️🏊🏻‍♀️🚴🏻‍♀️ Personally, spinning is the way I'm #MadeToMove. I know that as soon as I step out of a spin class, I'm moved both emotionally and physically😍 There's not much more I can ask for after a solid 45 minute class. Thankfully, I have my @Degree Dry Spray Antiperspirant to keep me feeling stainless, white-mark free, and fresh before, during, AND after class...because, post-class-brunch is necessary!😇😉
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
.
.
To enter the sweepstakes, all you have to do is post a picture or video on Instagram showing off HOW YOU MOVE, and if you feature a Degree product or logo in your post, you’ll earn an extra entry!!! The first 25 people to enter will win two free Degree Dry Sprays and 100 people will have the chance to win a $50 @walgreens gift card! Make sure to tag @Degree, @Walgreens, and use the hashtags #Sweepstakes and #MadeToMove in your caption to be eligible. NO PURCH NEC. 50 US/DC 18+. Ends 7/31!  Rules: http://unileversweepsrules.com/madetomove/

Follow Me!